Nothing in that title will make sense unless you read comics. Specifically, you read comics in the ’90s when Image Comics burst on the scene in a pathetic parody of revolution against Marvel and DC by producing superhero comics that were pale imitations of titles that had been around for twenty years.
Not only could none of them write worth a damn without plagarizing even the oldest of superheroes, but they couldn’t draw worth a damn some of the time. Rob Liefeld is a classic example. He couldn’t draw a human being to save his own life, much less accurately portray the form in action. He couldn’t draw, he couldn’t write and he was still one of the biggest names in comics during the ’90s. One of the “titans” that helped bring the entire industry to its knees with derivative storytelling, heroes with forearms bigger than their heads and women bent into impossible positions (to say nothing of having to drag around breasts that must have weighed forty pounds apiece).
So where does this diatribe originate? You might very well ask. Ask no more. Click on this link at your own peril if you’re one of the children who worshiped Image. If not, then sit back and look at forty of the most god-awful abuses of professional illustration ever actually published.
However, make no mistake. I know it was you who allowed someone like Liefeld to exist in the first place. Miller gave you The Dark Knight Returns and Moore gave you Watchmen, but it wasn’t good enough. You needed even more and crappier anti-heroes to adore. Then you decided you preferred comics if they didn’t actually have a story, because that left more room for half-naked women with big tits and bigger guns. Then you allowed Liefeld to not only defy human anatomy, but rules of perspective laid down since the Renaissance. (And yes, Picasso developed Cubism, but Picasso was doing it on purpose. You know how I know? Because he drew perfectly fine before breaking the rules.)
Oh, I know it’s cool to rag on Liefeld now, but I know who you are. One day it will all come out. Maybe when you move and your multiple foil cover, limited edition playing card issue number one of Youngblood falls out during a move. And then the world will know.
-K
